with men and things, than the nobleman with his tutor at his elbow, traversing foreign countries in search of information. * PROTEUS was exactly the sort of personage to suit the calculations of Mr. SCREW. PEREGRINE was fiery, ardent, ambitious; bent upon a peculiar object, and not to be thwarted from his purpose by any trifling obstacle. "Mr. PROTEUS, permit me to show you the theatre," said Screw, "and introduce you to your brother performers in the green room.* You will find amongst them several actors of immense talent. In my theatre, some of the great dons who are now strutting and fretting their hour" upon the boards of the Theatres Royal, made their first appearance as actors. I have, I assure you of the fact, Mr. PROTEUS, taught the best of them to speak, to walk, to sigh, to laugh, to start, to fence, to make love, to weep, and to do every thing that elevates the profession above all the other arts: but when I have done all this, sir, so ungrateful have these persons behaved to me that they have left my theatre for other engagements: the truth is, I am too liberal in bringing young men forward I put them into all the good parts: I make no reserve for myself, like all other managers indeed, I am content to doublet any character, and only anxious to make the most of every little bit. I have almost sworn that I would never teach another person the rudiments of our great art-that art, sir which makes the audience mistake art for nature: but I believe I must make an exception in your favour, Mr. PROTEUS: you have been so strongly recommended to my protection." You flatter me, Mr. SCREW, 1 am afraid," replied PEREGRINE. "No! upon my honour, I do not. However, I have merely to mention that Mr. Truncheon is my first tragedian, but he gives way to Mr. PROTEUS, owing to the brilliant character he has heard of his abilities. He is a Talma, a Kemble, a Kean, and a Young that is to say, Mr. PROTEUS, he has a small taste of all hose great actors combined in his own person. "Miss Made-up is my heroine: she is positively an actress of all work! a female Roscius. She is own sister to MELPOMENE and : *Much as I have been about theatres, and intimately as I have been acquainted with the sons of Thespis, it never occurred to my mind to inquire the origin of the title of the GREEN ROOM; but in Mr. Screw's company no explanation was required by PEREGRINE. It appeared to the astonishment of Proteus, most certainly, a green room, the grass growing under his feet. A thin partition only separated the performers from a couple of animals belonging to the dairy. It was the cow-house contiguous to the barn, which had been engaged for the occasion, aud fitted up, for a few nights only, by Mr. Screw as a theatre. Peregrine, on entering this most delectable recess, exclaimed, in the words of Bloomfield The fields his study-Nature was his book. By the word double is meant the necessity which often occurs in travelling companies, of the same individual personating two characters in the same performance. THALIA. Miss Made-up is a Siddons in the highest walk of the drama; and a perfect JORDAN in the paths of comedy. She is a delightful creature. The fact is, Mr. PROTEUS, she is too beautiful for my theatre; and I ought to have ten police officers in the pit to keep the gallants in order. You will make a fine Romeo to her Juliet. And I am only candid when I say, beware of her charms. In the balcony scene she is irresistible. Alack! there lies more peril in thine eye "Then, sir, we have Miss SCREAM-OUT, who takes the lead in my operas. She is all nature. She despises art. You might encore her twenty times; she is so strong, and so passionately fond of singing, that she never tires. Miss SCREAM-OUT has done more, in her professional exertions, Mr. PROTEUS, than ever Mrs. Billington did, or Catalani into the bargain. She has performed for me at twenty fairs, and sung thirty songs a day-No, no, I beg pardon, I should have said towns. Her pitch is very high; and she can descend with the utmost ease and rapidity, to the lowest note in the scale. But I suppose I shall not be able to keep her: those fellows from the Italian Opera have been buzzing about her lately, with the most tempting offers to sing upon their stage. I have been in grief about it for the last week; and did not sleep a wink during the night, so restless have I been upon the subject. I really don't know who would be a manager, Mr. PROTEUS. "In my ballet department I have a treasure indeed. Miss KICK-HER-HEELS is not to be equalled in the United Kingdom: I have seen them all. I am an old manager, Mr. PROTEUS, I have the whole corps-de-ballet, as it were, under my eye; and most of them have danced upon my stage, though I suppose they are too proud now to own it. The attitudes of PARISOT were superlatively good; she was graceful, elegant, and fascinating: and DEL CARO, in her line, delightful; but, nevertheless, give me Miss KICK-HER-HEELS against any dancer I ever saw. Her Columbine is far superior to the once celebrated Mrs. Wybrow; and the Messrs. Adams and Dennets, the cracks of their day, must yield the palm to my heroine. On the slackwire, the rope, the ground, and cutting in the air, she is a none-such! For a hornpipe, sir, rely upon my word, there was not a jack tar throughout the fleet but would have sooner forfeited a fifty pound share of his prize money than have missed the never-tobe-forgotten steps of the lively Miss KICKHER-HEELS. All Portsmouth was uproar during her stay; and Nancy Dawson looked upon as a fool, by comparison with my lady. Here again I must be candid, Mr. PROTEUS, and beg of you to be upon your guard against the very powerful attractions of Miss KICK-HER-HEELS! in an "Then last, but not the least, in the coin pany is my low comedian, Mr. EPHRAIM MUGCUTTER. The history of the stage cannot boast such an original cutter of mugs as Ephraim. He is a century before all the actors in the kingdom, living or dead: Tom Weston, Shuter, Noakes, Dodd, Parsons, Edwin, Munden, Dowton, Blanchard, Oxberry, Matthews, and Emery, all very great men in their line I admit, but little ones when placed in competition with Ephraim. With as much pliability as putty, he can cry on one half of his face, and laugh on the other side at the same time. I will back him at odds against the Emperor of FACE-makers (Mr. Liston); in fact, Mr. PROTEUS, I have been strongly pressed, nay, offered a handsome premium by the artists of the metropolis to let Mr. Mug-Cutter stand to them for a study. He has a fine face, abounding with expression, and full of capabilities, in which may be witnessed, highly tinted, all the great passions of LE BRUN. Mug Cutter is the very fool, too, that follows the advice of SHAKSPEARE: he speaks no more than what is set down for him by his author, except when I give him the word ad libitum. His comprehension is lively in the extreme; and instantly he understands every move and wink of my eyes. Mug-Cutter is a truly valuable fellow for C pulling them in:' I must be permitted to correct myself, Mr. PROTEUS, I should have said, to invite an audience to witness the performances at my theatre. But after all, the greatest quality he possesses, in my mind, is his gratitude for the instruction he has received under my tuition: the Bank of England, sir, could not tempt Mug Cutter to leave my stage. Whenever he lets loose the reins of his imagination, my powers fail me, I must not attempt to give even an outline of his comic humour. At a country wake the other day, in grinning through a horse collar, for the prize of a pound of tobacco, several of the country boobies went into fit's with laughter. Mug-Cutter was really great, Mr. PROTEUS, in the collar; he had not the trick of the stage to second his efforts, and it was a rich portrait of nature. To sum up his character in little, the Blue Devils are put to flight in his presence; the malady of the HYPOCHONDRIAC is forgotten in his company; and the phrase, so incessantly made use of by the French, of ennui, is never to be experienced within one hundred yards of Mr. MuG-Cutter! "I had almost forgotten to introduce to your notice, Mr. PROTEUS, my leader of the band, Mr. TEAZER. He is a perfect ORPHEUS in his line, although he cannot draw sticks and stones after him. I never exaggerate sir, I assure you, but it is truly extraordinary, as well as laughable, to witness the effects of his violin upon the nerves of the country people in general. During our circuit the other day, in removing from one town to another, we stopped at an inn to partake of some refreshment, when Mr. TEAZER took out his violin, and played two or three tunes so sweetly as to occasion in an instant a general movement throughout the house. The landlady could not stand still in her bar; and mine host approached his customers in the most ludicrous style; it was a hop, skip, and jump, with the waiters; the daughters of the innkeeper left off mixing brandy and water to join in a reel; and the whole of the company kept nodding their heads, and shaking their feet, to keep time to the ravishing instrument of Mr. TEAZER: such are the powers of my leader. To my taste, Mr. PROTEUS, and it is said of me, whether I deserve the compliment or not, that I possess an excellent ear for music, the celebrated Giordani, Viotti, Pinto, Salomon, Cramer, Weischell, and Spagnioletti were mere apologies, compared with Mr. TEAZER. His touches are so exquisitely fine, and his swell prodigiously grand and imposing. Handel would have been delighted with his knowledge of harmony; Mozart captivated by the brilliancy of his tones; and Storace in ecstasy with the rapidity of his execution. Yet, nevertheless, I am sorry to say that Mr. Teazer is too fond of a 'drop,' which might prove a very distressing circumstance to my feelings, had I not brought my company to such a high pitch of excellence as to be enabled to perform an opera without the aid of music! We can do strange things at country theatres, Mr. PROTEUS, which the metropolitan places of amusement dare not attempt. "In pantomimes we are quite at home; and, if our harlequin is not quite so elegant in his attitudes as those displayed by the father of Oscar Byrne in the party-coloured hero; so spirited as Jack Bologna; or so lively and active as Ellar, there is no ballet performer can strip him of his laurels on the ground. His pedigree is good; indeed it is of the first quality in the pantomimic line: he is descended from the celebrated harlequin, Phillips, so celebrated in the days of George the Second at Southwark Fair, who, to please his majesty, and to show the deception and talent of his art, Phillips, at the command of his sovereign, leaped down his own throat. Our clown is no fool neither. He can distance them all except JOEY GRIMALDI. Du. bois, Delpini, Jack Follett, and Laurent, came the nearest to my hero amongst the host of clowns in town or country. It is saying no little for my fool in placing him second to Grimaldi; in fact, I never saw an equal to the latter performer during the whole of my professional life. "When the managers of the classic theatres in the metropolis descended to employ horses to draw audiences to their houses, I trust, Mr. PROTEUS, that I need not make any apology in stating to you I once went round the country as the proprietor of a moving CIRCUS. "At Astley's I always admired the melodramatic pieces produced with the assistance of horses; and considered them perfectly in war. character, and I have also been most agreeably entertained at the Royal Circus with such like productions to represent the seat of But to a lover of the regular drama as I am, Mr. PROTEUS, you may depend upon it that I will never suffer any performer of mine to be annoyed by the introduction of horses on the boards of my theatre. "But I will not tease you any more, sir, with the incalculable merits of my other performers perhaps I may be too liberal in my disposition. Yet I never feel happy if I do not praise and reward merit as it deserves. However I will conclude with stating that you will meet with a combination of excellence in my company-in a word Multum in parvo. And with the addition of the abilities of Mr. PROTEUS (making a low bow), permit me to say, we shall carry every thing before us. I shall now take my leave for a short period, having to meet by appointment the Duchess of Never-fail, to bespeak a play. A fine chance for your opening. The Duchess is a most kindhearted and liberal creature; her smiles are the very high road to patronage and fame. I will speak to her Grace about your performance. In the interim I have no doubt you will soon become acquainted with the invaluable members of mycompany. -Egan's Life of an Actor. DOINGS AND SAYINGS IN THE PRIZE RING. DICK CURTIS. AND PERKINS. This match, which had excited considerable interest throughout the Fancy, both at Oxford and London, was decided on Tuesday, December 30, 1829, in Parish Meadow, Hurley Bottom, Berks, 34 miles from the Metropolis, for £100 aside. The Pet of the Fancy was known to every person connected with the Milling Circles; but PERKINS, who had obtained the designation of the "OXFORD PET," was little more than a stranger to the London Ring. Perkins, it is true, had defeated Raines in good style; and had also beaten Price, the Oxford Sticker. It is urged that Curtis had spoken rather contemptuously of Perkins, as a Milling Cove, and this circumstance brought about the match in question. Curtis went into training at Hartley Row; and Perkins under the care of Mr. Shirley, at the New Inn, Staines. Six to four was betted without any hesitation upon Dick, when the match was first made, but, before fighting, the takers became more numerous; five to four was greedily accepted and upon the day of fighting drawing near, Perkins had risen so high in the confidence of his friends, that scarcely any odds were asked at all. The road on Monday evening, although it was uncommonly dark, dreary, and foggy, nevertheless, such was the interest manifested by the Fancy to see the PET once more in the P. R., that every inn in the route to Maidenhead was overflowing with company; and the dabs, generally speaking, were all occupied. Brentford, Colnbrook, and Windsor, were overdone with visitors; and even Tom Cox [the Prad and the Slavey], at Datchet, could not find roosting-places for his numerous customers. A stranger, on meeting with a polite refusal to his request, observed to Mine Host,' "It is a new landlord, certainly, that keeps this house, an't it? It was kept by one of the greatest blackguards of the name of Cox, in the kingdom, for some years?” No, Sir," said Tom, making a grand salam, 66 my name is Cox; but owing to the King, God bless him, being a gentlemanly sort of man, a neighbour of mine, and the Court so ncar to me, I have taken lessons out of Chesterfield for the purpose, and d―mme, I beg pardon, but I have become quite a genteel man ever since." Owing to the assistance we derived from Ben Black's improved carriage lamp (more particularly after groping our way in the dark so long), we trotted along towards the scene of action with as much ease and security as if it had been broad day-light. We have no hesitation in recommending them to the Fancy and public in general, who set any thing like a value upon their lives, to use Black's lamps, which enables the driver to possess a most powerful light, sixty yards and upwards from his gig, along the road. Vehicles of every description were seen early on the Tuesday morning, both from Oxford and London, to arrive in time at the scene of action. So many persons have not been scen at a Mill for several years past. The ring was made in the best part of the field; but in many places near the ropes it was ancle deep in mud, and flooded with water. Some thousands of persons were present. At one o'clock Curtis appeared, and threw his hat into the ring; he was dressed very genteel. His colours were orange. He was seconded by Josh. Hudson and Young Sam. Perkins followed almost immediately, and repeated the token of defiance. Tom Spring and Harry Holt were his seconds. His colours were crimson. On meeting each other in the ring, like true Englishmen, they shook hands together. It was the general opinion that "DICK was overmatched !" The odds had got down rapidly; and ten pounds to nine were taken by several of the friends of Perkins. The men and the seconds crossed their hands in friendship, and the battle commenced : ROUND 1.-Curtis peeled well: placed himself in an excellent attitude; and viewed his opponent from head to foot with the utmost confidence, seeming to say, "I'll soon tip the Yohel what he will not like!" Perkins was cool, collected, and quite ready for the combat. His appearance altogether was decidedly in his favor; and had he not been opposed to the "all-conquering Curtis" the disparity of size between him and the PET, must have insured his being backed at odds. shoulders were round and good, and indicated strength; his arms were muscular; and pins His 66 Dick round and firm. His nob a fighting one; snakeheaded, such as the Fancy like; and such as the Faney assert belongs to a 66 good-un." The eye of Dick was fine and penetrating: he kept a good look out, and was determined as soon as the opportunity offered to give the 'Oxford Scholar' summut for himself! Dick crept in by degrees, made a feint; it would not do, Perkins was awake; Dick, like an auctioneer's catalogue, came ditto, ditto, ditto, and ditto --but it was of no use, the Cove was leary,' and not to be gammoned; he would not give half a chance away, kept his position, did not offer to return a blow, but stood as firm as a rock, with his weather eye up! FIVE MINUTES! and not a blow struck! This, most certainly, was a new feature in the battles of Curtis; and extorted from the backers of the Pet, that Perkins was a troublesome customer!" "Go to work," was the cry. at length placed a slight facer; and in the exchange of hits, in a rally, he napt a rum one between the chaffer and the sneezer, when Spring called out "First blood! and we shall win it!" This was also another new feature! The Pet was on the alert, and planted a heavy blow on Perkins's domino box! In fact, he would not be denied, and was determined to try the pluck of his opponent. Severe counter hits again occurred, and the left Peeper of Perkins napt it, and the claret followed. "That's a tie," said Josh, "Claret on both sides." Curtis, on the bustle, went to work; blows were exchanged, when the Oxford Scholar' went down from a slight hit. Thunders of applause from all parts. The Kentstreet Lads; the Bermondsey Boys; the Old Fanciers; the principal part of the Boxers; all roaring out like Fun, at the success of the Pet. 2. Curtis, active and ready, again appeared at the scratch; and endeavoured to take the lead. It was evident, at this early part of the fight, to the spectators, that the Pet had got his work to do, and the length of his adversary made him appear rather at fault. Perkins had been well counselled, the feints of Dick had not the desired effect, and he would not be_gummoned to alter his position. Curtis planted a right-handed blow, but Perkins was with him. In a sharp rally it was give and take the sensitive plant of the Oxford Scholar received a small taste and Dick did not get off gratis. In finishing the round Perkins went down from a hit; it was not received as a knock down blow. Another roar of artillery; "Bravo, my little Pet, you will soon make it all right!" 3. The Oxford Boy was as cool as a cucumber; and acted upon the defensive. The PET, like a skilful general, kept a good look out, tried a variety of manoeuvres; but on letting fly, Perkins stopped the blow in admirable style. ["Well done Peggy Perkins,' from the Oxford Swell Dragsman; he'll soon be stopped altogether. Why, he's got the whip hand of the Pet now."] Perkins endeavoured 4. This was a capital round: the Pet satisfied his friends of his fine knowledge of the science; and Perkins astonished the crowd with his skill and ability as a Pugilist. The mug of Curtis appeared agitated; and the handy-work of his opponent was also visible. After a little manoeuvring, Curtis hit out, but was stopped. ["BEAUTIFUL!" from the Classical part of the audience.] The Pet now was compelled to adopt a new mode, and made very free with the Grub Warehouse of his opponent. ["Capital," said young Sam; "what a fine way of improving digestion."] Perkins on the alert, cleverly planted a right-handed hit. "Good," said the Gent. from the BOWERS, near the Seat of Larning: "one slap-up now and that will do for me: they all count towards winning." Dick was very successful in making body blows; but yet they did not appear to reduce either the strength or confidence of Perkins; counter-hits, and mischief done on both sides. The science of Dick was here praised by all the admirers of Pugilism; he stepped in and out; he toed his opponent, to make his hitting secure, and boldly went in to finish the round, but his left hand was open. In a rally, spirited on both sides, the chaffingbox of Dick had the worst of it. The claret was also discovered on both of their facesindeed it was pepper alley on the side of Dick; Cannon Street administered by Perkins. Job, versus hit went on to the end of the Chapter, until the Oxford Scholar measured his length on his mother earth. The cheering was loud all round the ring; and the backers of Curtis again were happy. "The little one is as good as gold; there is nothing like him on the list. We can't lose it now." 5. Dick, on appearing at the mark, shewed symptoms of distress; and that the bustling system was rather too much for him: in fact, in all his other battles, he generally put his opponents on the fret; but, in this contest with Perkins, the case was altered. The grubbery was again knocked about by the Pet, but the firmness of Perkins enabled him not to flinch from the coming blow. An exchange of blows occurred in a rally; in struggling for the throw both went down, but the Oxford Scholar undermost. The applause was still on the side of Dick; and his friends stuck to him. 6. Curtis very cautious, yet anxious to do mischief, let fly at Perkins' nob, but the latter parried it off, in first-rate style. Dick again punished his opponent's body, when Stockman roared out, "Dick, have some mercy on his palings, do not knock them in." [Laughter.] The Oxford Scholar now satisfied the spectators that he was no Yokel, but a good boxer, and up to a trick or two. The Pet, in a clever manner, got away from a quietus blow aimed at his head. In a rally some sharp blows were exchanged, Jack as good as his master, until the Oxford Scholar went down. "It is a capital fight," was the cry; and who ever saw any other boxer do so much with Curtis, as this countryman. 7. The Pet's mug looked a little queer; it did not display its usual serenity; his mouth was parched, and he relieved his thirst with some brandy and water. He planted two hits in succession on the body; but the Oxford boy seemed to say "who cares for that?-I'm as tough as wire, and I can stand it for a month." The steadiness displayed by Perkins claimed the admiration of the whole ring. Perkins received a heavy blow on his neck; and had he not retreated from danger, summut might have been the matter. The Pet also finding that head-work was not to be got at without great difficulty, again resorted to the Grub Warehouse, and he made three successful moves towards digestion. "The first," said young Sam," was a taste from Cambridge; the second, a hint from Oxford; and the third, a sort of finishing touch of education, from the London New University." The Pet, rather angry, tried to put on the polish, and boldly went up to the head of his opponent, who retreated towards the ropes. In closing, Perkins went down, and Dick upon him. Great cheering for Curtis-" He is a fine, brave little fellow! but he is overmatched," observed the Sage of the East. "Such a match ought not to have been made. But I supposes as how we must now leave it all to the Cook!" 8. The Oxford Scholar now showed his Passport as to a good Boxer; the stops on both sides were cheered by the spectators. The fight had now become truly interesting Hopes and fears were seen in the countenances of the Backers of Dick; and the Cxonians were all in the stirrups as to Victory. The conduct displayed by Perkins, against so accomplished a Pugilist as Dick Curtis, had satisfied them their judgment was correct. Both of the men rallied like nothing else but out-and-outers; and lots of claret trickled down their faces. The blows were hard and fast, and a lunging one from Perkins, floored the PET like a SHOT! The row was immense; the Classical Gents were almost out of their senses with joy at this sudden slice of luck." Perkins for ever! Perkins for 10001." THE LONDONERS WERE PANIC STRUCK.-The bolting of the Great Stakeholder near the Blunt Magazine, could not be worse to their feelings; -the latter hit was a Rowland for an Oliver-they were all reduced to DUMMIES in the twinkling of an eye-silence was the order of the daytheir choppers as long as Patterson's Road Book, and blue, green, yellow, and all manner of colours, summut like the incantation scene in Der Frieschutz, It was a sort of charmed bullet for the Oxonians-one of whom exclaimed, with all the solemnity of a preacher, 66 "Curtis will have to say, 'Farewell, a long farewell to all my greatness !!!'" 9. This last touch was another new feature in the milling history of Curtis. Dick came up game, but he could not conceal his distress; he was piping; nay, very far from home; indeed, several of the Oxonians would have it he was quite abroad. He commenced an attack upon the grubbery, and also rather wildly tried to nob Perkins. The latter retreated skilfully to the corner of the ropes, when punishment was given on both sides. The strength, LENGTH, and FRESHNESS here told with tremendous effect; but the Pet, who is nothing else but blood, game, and bone, fighting almost upon the system of Death or Glory,' exerted himself to the utmost, to get a turn in his favour. But the day was gone by, he could not reach the upper-works of his opponent with effect; his blows fell too short, yet there was Pepper about them. In closing, Curtis captured his opponent's 'knowledgebox,' and was endeavouring to weave it under his arms, but the Oxford Boy said, 'it was no go!' and slipped skilfully down out of mischief. The Backers of DICK were now changed into Alarmists—the hedging system was immediately adopted by those that were lucky; and who got their money off like winking!' 10. The strength of Dick was rapidly on the decline; but not his pluck-he had been bustled about too much. "Do not Josh," said Tom Owen, "let him play at long bowls keep him close to his work, he can only win upon that suit, d'ye mind me, John Bull !" The Pet went boldly in to mill, exchanges took place between them, and Curtis met with a rum one on the side of his head. In a rally, mischief was meant on both sides; but by comparison as to taking it, Dick might be compared to a man in a consumption, while Perkins, on the contrary, possessed the strength of rude health. Ultimately Perkins went down, and Dick upon him. The University Coves were now as jolly as Sand Boys, and looked upon the Long Odds as their own; nay, the battle reduced to a certainty, and only to ask for the blunt; and the Knight of the Whip, to make the "wisit pleasant," was humming part of the Old Stave," Will you come to the BOWERS? which I have planted for you?" 11th and last. "The pitcher goes once too often to the well:" and such was the unfortunate case of the darling of the Fancy. The Pet was quite aware that sparring would be of no use to him; and nothing else but downright punishment could reduce Perkins to his grasp. He, therefore, made up his mind to try what severe milling would effect in his behalf; but Perkins was satisfied that he had 'got the Pet.' The blows on both sides were severe indeed, and Curtis received in turn a blow for every one he planted upon his adversary. Perkins, at length, put in a tremendous stunner on the side of Dick's nob, |