SPEED. Marry. by these special marks; first, you have learn'd, like Sir Protheus, to wreath your arms like a male-content; to relish a love-fong, like a Robin-red-breast; to walk alone, like one that had the peftilence; to figh like a school-boy that had loft his A, B, C; to weep, like a young wench that had buried her grandam; to faft, like one that takes diet; to watch, like one that fears robbing; to speak puling, like a beggar at Hallowmas. You were wont, when you laugh'd, to crow like a cock; when you walk'd, to walk like one of the lions; when you fafted, it was presently after dinner; when you look'd fadly, it was for want of moncy: and now you are metamorphos'd with a mistress, that, when I look on you, I can hardly think you my master. VAL. Are all these things perceiv'd in me?

SPEED. They are all perceiv'd without ye.
VAL. Without me? they cannot.

SPEED. Without you? nay, that's certain: for without you were so simple, none else would: But you are so without thefe follies, that these follies are within you, and shine through you like the water in an urinal; that not an eye that fees you, but is a physician to comment on your malady.

VAL. But tell me, doft thou know my lady Silvia? SPEED. She, that you gaze on so as fhe fits at fupper? VAL. Haft thou observ'd that? even the I mean: SPEED. Why, Sir, I know her not.

VAL. Doft thou know her by my gazing on her, and yet know'ft her not!

SPEED. Is the not hard-favour'd, Sir?

VAL. Not so fair, boy, as well favour'd
SPEED. Sir, I know that well enough.

VAL. What doft thou know?

SPEED. That he is not fo fair, as of you well-favour'd. VAL. I mean that her beauty is exquisite,

But her favour infinite.

SPEED. That's because the one is painted, and the other out of all count.

VAL. How painted? and how out of count >>

SPEED. Marry, Sir, fo painted to make her fair, that no man counts of her beauty..

VAL. How esteem'st thou me ? I account of her beauty. SPEED. You never faw her fince she was deform'd.

VAL. How long hath she been deform'd?

SPEED. Ever fince you lov'd her.

VAL. I have lov'd her, ever fince I saw her.

And ftill I fee her beautiful.

SPEED. If you love her, you cannot fee her.
VAL. Why?

SPEED. Because love is blind.

O, that you had mine eyes, or your own eyes had the lights they were wont to have, when you chid at Sir Protheus for going ungarter'd! VIAL. What fhould I fee then?

SPEED. Your own prefent folly, and her paffing deformity: For he, being in love, could not fee to garter his hose; and you, being in love, cannot fee to put on your hofe.

VAL. Belike, boy, then you are in love: for last morning you could not fee to wipe my shoes,

SPEED, True, Sir, I was in love with my bed; thank you, you fwing'd me for my love, which makes me the bolder to chide you for yours.

VAL. In conclufion, I ftand affected to her.

SPEED. I would you were fet, fo your affection would ceafe.

VAL. Last night the injoin'd me to write fome lines to

one fhe loves.

SPEED. And have you?

VAL. I have.

SPEED. Are they not lamely writ?

VAL. No, boy, but as well as I can do them:

Peace, here fhe comes.

Enter Silvia.

SPEED. Oh excellent motion! Oh exceeding puppet! Now will he interpret to her.

VAL. Madam and miftrefs, a thousand good morrows. SPEED. Oh! 'give ye good ev'n; here's a million of man

ners.

SIL. Sir Valentine and servant, to you two thousand. SPEED. He should give her interest; and she gives it him. VAL. As you injoin'd me, I have writ your letter, Unto the fecret, nameless, friend of yours;

Which I was much unwilling to proceed in,

But for my duty to your ladyship.

SIL. I thank you, gentle fervant; 'tis very clerkly done. VAL. Now trust me, madam, it came hardly off: For being ignorant to whom it goes,

I writ at random, very doubtfully.

SIL. Perchance, you think too much of fo much pains? VAL. No, madam, so it steed you, I will write, Please you command, a thousand times as much.

And yet

SIL. A pretty period; well, I guess the sequel; And yet I will not name it; and yet I care not; And yet take this again; and yet I thank you; Meaning henceforth to trouble you no more.

SPEED. And yet you will; and yet, another yet. [Afide. VOL. I.

N

VAL. What means your ladyfhip? do you not like it?

SIL. Yes, yes, the lines are very quaintly writ;
But fince unwillingly, take them again;
Nay, take them.

VAL. Madam, they are for you.

SIL. Ay, ay; you writ them, Sir, at my request; But I will none of them; they are for you:

I would have had them writ more movingly.

VAL. Please you, I'll write your ladyfhip another. SIL. And when it's writ, for my fake read it over; And if it please you, fo; if not, why fo.

VAL. If it please me, madam, what then?

SIL. Why if it please you, take it for your labour; And fo good morrow, fervant.

SPEED. O jeft unfeen, infcrutable, invisible,

[Exit.

As a nofe on a man's face, or a weathercock on a steeple!
My mafter fues to her, and the hath taught her fuitor,
He being her pupil, to become her tutor :

O excellent device! was there ever heard a better?
That my master, being the scribe, to himself should write
the letter?

VAL. How now, Sir, what are you reasoning with yourfelf?

SPEED. Nay, I was rhiming; 'tis you that have the reason.

VAL. To do what?

SPEED. To be a spokesman from madam Silvia.

VAL. To whom?

SPEED. To yourfelf; why, the wooes you by a figure.
VAL. What figure?

SPEED. By a letter, I fhould fay.

VAL. Why, the hath not writ to me?

SPEED. What need the,

When she hath made you write to yourself?
Why, do you not perceive the jeft?

VAL. No, believe me.

SPEED. No believing you, indeed, Sir: but did you perceive her earnest?

VAL. She gave me none, except an angry word.

SPEED. Why, she hath given you a letter.

.VAL. That's the letter I writ to her friend.

SPEED. And that letter hath the deliver'd, and there's an end.

VAL. I would it were no worse.

SPEED. I'll warrant you, 'tis as well.

"For often have you writ to her, and she in modesty, "Or else for want of idle time, could not again reply;

"Or fearing elfe fome meffenger, that might her mind dif- · 66 cover,

“Herself hath taught her love himself to write unto her "lover."

All this I fpeak in print, for in print I found it.

Why mufe you, Sir? 'tis dinner time.

VAL. I have din'd.

SPEED. Ay, but hearken, Sir: the' the Cameleon love can feed on the air, I am one that am nourish'd by my victuals, and would fain have meat: Oh be not like your mistress; be moved, be moved. [Exeunt.

SCENE II.

Changes to Julia's house at Verona.

Enter Protheus and Julia.

PRO. Have patience, gentle Julia.

JUL. I muft, where is no remedy.