Sidor som bilder

to the fire, if it were winter, and to the severe reprimands when he omits nearbow-window in summer, and passed ly throttling himself with vast rolls of between you the huge flat-bottomed handkerchiefs if he puts his foot out. decanter that held two good quarts of of doors after mid-day, especially in claret, and yet modestly called itself a an east wind. Yes! we may safely say bottle of wine ! Not, oh venerable that Miss Barbara Hubble, a spinster and esteemed Ignatius, that you were sister of mature years, contrives to addicted to the pleasures of the table make his home as agreeable to him as -falsely so called-or that you de- if he had a wife. The part of children graded the high character of a philo is played to the life by George and sopher and a scholar by an unseemly Mary Hope--the offspring of a favou. regard for creature-comforts in a liquid rite niece whom Ignatius has adopted, shape, but simply because you knew and whom all the world has long ago that the good-natured visitor would be set down for his heirs. sedate and silent, prepared to swallow “ But the theory of education, my with pleasure and edification whatever dear Sir Wilfred, is very insufficiently you chose to pour into him—whether developed. The faculties are treated through the medium of a green glass as if they were potatoes or turnips nearly as large as a barrel, and in the that had been planted at a particular shape of prime old Bordeaux-or time, and at another particular time through your own lips, tipt with ce- were expected to come to maturity. lestial fire, and in the shape of an ora- The faculties, I maintain, on the other tion to which all the bees of Hymettus hand, vary so astonishingly, so much, had contributed their honey, and no and so greatly in the period of their small portion of their bum. Then acquiring the fulness of their growth, you knew that you might harangue to that sometimes they are in a very imattentive ears on all manner of sub- perfect state even in old age. You jects-on the adventures of your youth have met with old people who were - the studies of your manhood—the stupid, ignorant, dull ?” reflections of your age—your disco. Sir Wilfred looked at his host veries in science-your experience in through the mist that had begun to all things-your disappointments in settle over his eyes, and observing that love! For you know you were disap- the old gentleman addressed the ques. pointed, though you sometimes pre- tion to him in a very pointed manner, tend you jilted the widow ; Ignatius! answered, “Oh yes, dull enough, my it was the widow that jilted you. good sir; but with a bottle of such You've confessed it a hundred times claret as this we can do very well, I to Sir Wilfred, and he has a hundred assure you." times forgotten the whole concern; “Well, sir, the cause of their stufor your communicativeness on such pidity, even in extreme old age, is, topics has generally reached its height that they have not completed their when the aforesaid decanter was for education. The generality of manthe second time in the very act of en- kind are not qualified for any place but listing in the marines; an incident school till they are fifty years of age. which had a very remarkable effect on I myself, Sir Wilfred, was under a the memory of your friend. But hark! strict tutor till thirty-five ; I have rethe drawing-room bell is vehemently gretted ever since that he died when I pulled for at least the twentieth time, had reached that period, or he might and a sharp, clear, precise voice is have continued his superintendence of heard saying to Abraham Slocock me till the present time." Are you certain you told the gentle. " He would be a pretty old gentlemen that tea was ready ?

man if he stuck so long on the perch," So Ignatius is a husband ?-perhaps hiccuped the listener. a father?-_a patriarch with his table “Not much above a hundred, which, quite overshadowed with olive branch- by a recurrence to the patriarchal mode es ? Ah, no! a bachelor has he been, of life, might again be rendered the and is likely to be to the end of time. prime of manhood. I myself, Sir And yet many of the comforts that Wilfred, feel as if I were still in the only the weaker vessels, as we politely teens of my understanding ; and with call them, can bestow, are in our ex. regard to your boy that you complain cellent friend's possession-sour looks of, what is he but a babe ?--a suck. when he is not exactly punctual, and ling?"

only "

" He sucks me pretty hard," said my dear Hubble," continued Sir Wilthe baronet, emptying the bottle ; fred, slowly rising, “and we can finish "five hundred last term, and no chance the rest of this business some other that I can see of weaning him."

time." " An infant without teeth,” conti. “ No time like the present," renued Ignatius, “a creature scarcely plied Ignatius, pushing the madeira in the dawn of existence, fit only for a to his companion, who resumed bis rattle and long clothes”—

seat once more, “ a tutor must un. " Long clothes !” exclaimed the doubtedly be procured, and by way baronet, who was no dab at metaphor, of setting a good example, I am on and could not make out what might the point of engaging one's services be the meaning of all this nursery myself.” phraseology, “ long clothes, my good « You, Mr Hubble ? what do you sir ? you mean long clothes-bills-do want with a tutor ?" you know that you are talking of “ I have a nephew, Sir Wilfreil, Arthur Hammond, my son, six feet who turns out very differently from high, strong as a horse, and waiting what I expected. Instead of feeding very impatiently for his first commis- himself with solid food that would sion in the blues ? and where the raise him up a Hercules among the devil I'm to find the needful, Heaven sons of men, he stuff's himself with

light unwholesome garbage-would • You misapprehend me, Sir Wil. you believe it, Sir Wilfred, he told fred, I speak in figures. I give you me himself that he had not the slightthe ideal presentment of an intellect est relish for Bacon." still in the cradle, scarcely old enough “ Very bad taste, that's all ; for I yet to amuse itself with wooden think a rasher with a few eggs-or horses"-

even boil'd with good beans-one of the « A cursed deal too knowing a best dishes a man can sit down to." judge for that ; no, Arthur has a good “ I allude not to eatables, my good eye for a nag," muttered the father, sir," replied Ignatius; “'tis food for who was again lost in a fog.

the mind I talk of. Yes! George " With but the experience of two. Hope has disappointed me. With and-twenty years to enable it to grope Buffon and Cuvier in my hands, I its way through the dark places of have endeavoured for hours and hours this world; you must indeed, my dear to explain to him the formation, quafriend, view the slight aberrations of lities, instincts, and habitudes of the such extreme juvenility with more animal creation. I even presented philosophical eyes. In thirty or forty him at his repeated request, with two years more, I have no doubt Mr horses on which to conclude his stuArthur Hammond will be a very steady dies in natural history ; and in a and rational young man. Get him a month, one of them was found sustutor, 'tis the only way.".

pended by a huge iron spike run " A tutor for a fellow six feet through its body on the top of a high high ?”

gate in the hunting-ground of the 6 My dear sir, if he were a walking Duke of Beaufort. How it got there pyramid 'twould make no difference. is a mystery to me to this hour ; and

Tis of the intellect I speak—that may the other (seized in all human proba. be of the very minutest tenuity while bility by à fit of delirium to which the corporeal covering is gigantic as the equine genus are liable), leapt over the sons of Anak. But the tutor's fifty hurdles in less than five minutes, business would be to model the plastic and committed deliberate suicide by clay of the still flexible understanding drowning itself in a broad ditch which into what shape he chose ; he would intersects a line drawn between this curb, restrain, reward, and punish, church-tower and Highwell steeple." till the youthful pupil”--

“He hunts and rides steeple chases," “ Would probably lay hands on muttered the baronet, without being the tutor's collar, and fling him into audible to the pre-occupied Ignatius. the nearest pond."

" He's a tight lad, young Hope, I (Ting ! ting ! ting ! " Abraham, are must have him over to Hammondale." you perfectly sure you told the gen- “ I may say the same,” continued tlemen that tea was growing cold ?"') Ignatius, “ with regard to the princi.

“ But the old girl gets impatient, ples of buoyancy and suspension. I

purchased a boat for him that he might shall teach your nephew Chaldaic in become experimentally acquainted with a week." the power of resistance offered by “ Languages I do not insist on. water to a body passing through it ; Those, I can teach him myself; 'tis that he might see the influence of life! life! life !" light currents of wind on the sails. “ Send him to Paris, if life is what He seemed to attach some importance you want to show him. I learned to the size of the vessel, and professed more there in a fortnight, than the a strong desire to make his experi- rest of the world could have taught ments on a large scale. The scene me in a century. Frascatis-Tivoli he fixed on was Southampton water in the Palais Royal—the Theatresthe neighbouring county; and would ah, my dear fellow, I've a great mind you believe it, Sir Wilfred, I thought to be his tutor myself.he was busily engaged in taking his “'Tis not shows and spectacles I scientific observations, till yesterday's require. Of these, we have plenty post brought me a letter dated from here. I remember twelve years ago, Stornoway, and accompanying an seeing a Swiss giantess in London order on me for 150 pounds in fa- seven feet high, so that we need not vour of Rory M.Tosh, fish-curer and leave our own island for extraordinary bailie."

sights ;- no, the life I mean is the - Joined the Yacht Club," snored co-existent, yet in visible life within us Sir Wilfred ; “ go it, George." —the deep caves of reason, sentiment,

- You therefore perceive that a and reflection, where the metaphytutor is indispensable.”

sical genii are perpetually at work ; • A pilot more likely; those rocky rearing subterranean palaces more seas are no joke to a young one," said stately and enduring than those of the baronet.

Aladdin-fit habitation for him who “ A pilot, indeed, as you express it, reigns over his subject thoughts, the Sir Wilfred, is what both our young king of the world of shadows which men require; a person of firm and are more real than wood and stone decided character to hold the helm the etherial, pure, idealized soul.” steadily in all the storms he may en- “ Abraham !" exclaimed the voice counter; a person of mature years we have heard before, “ go and tell and great experience. Money would the gentlemen that the tea is cold, be no object with me could I but pro- the candles burnt out, and Miss Hope cure so inestimable a guide for the and I gone to bed." wandering steps of my youthful charge. “Then, Abraham," said Mr HubSurely, Sir Wilfred, at one or other ble, as the faithful domestic, with a of our glorious Universities, a gentle. fidelity worthy of Homer's messengers, man with these qualifications could be delivered the notice word for word, found."

“ bring in some fried bones, and lay “ If you don't grudge the money," the cognac on the table. I believe, said Sir Wilfred, “ you can get any Sir Wilfred, you always take it thing you require."

cold"_ “ I would not grudge the money." "Without," continued the worthy

" Then leave the tutor getting to baronet, and sipt the last drop of his me; by George! I'll get you a fellow madeira with a sigh.


To Arthur Hammond, Esq., Trinity College, Cambridge. « My Dear Son,

know that, if I am pushed to extremi. « Mr Flashy wrote to me to say, ties, you will not refuse me your that not another shilling could be rais assistance, and an amazingly good ed among the tenants, and that, as he offer has already been made for Ashy. was about to separate from his partner, well, if you will join me in breaking he must clear off all old scores, and the entail. This I will not ask you therefore sends in his bill. The ras. to do, unless the necessity is very cal; he thinks he has bis noose too urgent; but as I think I see symptoms firmly round my neck for me to kick ; in Sir Hilary Jupp of an intention to but he shall find he is mistaken, i call up his money, you had better run up for a day or two to London, and old gentleman's fancying a tutor can visit him in his suburban paradise at be found to refine him; but people Muswell Hill, and pay great attention like Mr Hubble, my dear Arthur, to the tall young woman I introduced must be humoured in their whims, you to at Cheltenham. She is his and I have promised to employ you only child, and they say will have ten among the big wigs and wise men in thousand a-year; and as the whole of Cambridge, to procure for him a perit was made by selling blankets, I son such as he requires. I shall also don't doubt you would be able with write by this day's post to my friend that sum to keep yourselves warm and Colonel O'Donahue, who is living comfortable. In fact, my dear Ar- near Wallingford, to look me out a bearthur, I have certainly held out some leader in Oxford, and his task will be expectations of that sort to the old easier as I have the name of a person to usurer, and I shall therefore consider whom he is to apply-Jerome Whiffle, it a piece of dutiful obedience if you A.M.-in whom Mr Hubble has such will either marry her without delay, confidence (from having read a book or keep her in hopes of it for as long of his on education), that he will enas you possibly can. The thousand gage with him at once, if Mr Whif. pounds you ask is paid into Drum- fle will undertake the charge. In the mond's, but for Heaven's sake, my mean-time, be on the out-look, and if dear boy, be careful; for extravagance O'Donahue fails in securing Whiffle, is the worst vice a young man can you will be prepared with a substipossibly indulge in. The week I spent tute from Cambridge. I shall desire at Scarfield has answered very well. the Colonel to write to you whether Old Hubble is a real gentleman, he succeeds in his commission; which though he has a little more ready will be a saving of time, and also of money than is quite the thing; but trouble to me, as letter-writing is not bating that, and a cursed odd way he my forte. Be careful of the thousand has of speaking like an encyclopedia, pounds, and never play high with a he is a most excellent and worthy bad partner; don't forget to visit man. Your mother continues as much Muswell Hill, and I think, on farther attached as ever to his niece Mary acquaintance, the squint you observed Hope, and talks of asking her here will disappear. Believe me, your af. again sometime next month. His fectionate father, nephew is at present in Scotland in

“ WILFRED HAMMOND. his yacht, if I can make out old Hubble's story, and is in want of a tutor. “ No news yet from the Horse If you knew what a great rough Tony Guards—but we may expect to hear Lumpkin sort of a bear he was, you very soon." would be some little astonished at the

To Sir Wilfred Hammond-Hammondale. 66 Dear FATHER,

velopement of the mental powers on - Many thanks for the draft on which you have told me he is so eloDrummonds, which I will keep as long quent, can be carried on under the as it will stay by me, as a memorial of most favourable auspices. I am glad your fatherly regard. The hint about my mother is going to ask the young Miss Jupp shall be attended to, and girl, Miss Hope, to visit her again. I the squint as little observed as possi- thought her society was of great use ble. As to George Hope and his tu to the old lady last summer, and I tor, I rejoice very much you told O'. have no doubt will be equally agreeDonahue to write to me as to the suc. able this. I am pushed for time, as cess of his enquiries, as I should have Euclid is waiting, and I remain, dear assuredly failed in getting any one so father, your affectionate son, qualified for the place as Mr Whiffle.

“ ARTHUR HAMMOND,” The Colonel writes me on the subject, so your mind may be quite at rest. “ So far, so good," said Sir WilYoung Hope will obtain all the po- fred on receipt of this missive from his lish and experience that the pride of son. « Old Hubble will see that I

Oxford can impart, and the old gen- have exerted myself to oblige him. *tleman's experiment on the slow de. The ten thousand a-year will reconcile Arthur to the squint- the villain have been had without it; the next, I Flashy shall be paid off, and all will fear, won't come without the actual go well-I'll run up for a few days to marriage; for the old blanket-maker town, and get a horse for Tom Her- begins to ride rusty."rick in place of Brown Tiger, which --A pity that plans so deeply is certainly grown groggy. Another laid, should be so completely overconversation with Sir Hilary will do thrown as were those of poor Sir no harm at the same time. I wish I Wilfred ; as we are under the dishad told the boy at once, I had made agreeable necessity of explaining to an arrangement for him to marry the the reader in the course of the follow. girl. That last five thousand could'nt ing pages.


It is much to be lamented that ladies ing the number of guests as low as begin to require spectacles just at the possible. time when they grow most inquisitive. One day, about a fortnight after The prying propensities of fifty, join Sir Wilfred's visit to Scarfield-ined to the clear eyesight of twenty-five, deed it was on the 15th day of August, would have made our hitherto invisi. 1838 – Miss Barbara had occasion to ble friend Miss Barbara Hubble, per- go to the upper portion of the village fectly intolerable. As it was, people to enquire into certain rumours touch. were astonished at her powers of vi. ing the behaviour of one of the inhasion. With a particularity that only bitants, and was accompanied, as far belongs to an eye-witness, she could as the little stream on which the vildescribe events that occurred at the lage is situated, by her grand-niece, same moment at opposite extremities Mary Hope. A basket slung over of the parish ; and it was remarked, her arm, and a fishing-rod in her hand, that if a slight degree of impropriety showed that she intended could be elected in the events of which she was an observer, the per

. “ To ply the sport

Which that sweet season gave ;" spicacity of her vision seemed supernaturally increased. She could see it and Mary was indeed allowed to be at five miles' distance, though invisible one of the best casters of a line that to any eyes but her own. Miss Bar. fished on the Scarfield water. In fact, bara, in short, was one of those pure if you looked in Mary's face, you and happy creatures that one reads of would allow her to be any thing in the in fairy tales, who have no means of world--for such faces and figures are understanding in their own persons not seen every day, and we have a wbat faults or imperfections may be, very poor opinion of the fish that did and are therefore forced to study them not catch hold of her hook immediate. in the characters and conduct of other ly, that they might have a nearer people. It will easily be imagined view of such a beautiful creature. If that Miss Barbara, having freed her we were a fish--but we shall not self from all the blots and blemishes mention what a lot of foolish things that human kind are liable to in this we should be inclined to do,--suffice world, had come to the conclusion that it to say, that Mary Hope was the she was a chosen vessel, and sure of prettiest girl in England; dark hair, felicity in the next; a felicity which, blue eyes--step like a fawn, smile like according to the old adage, must be an angel-and for all other particuvery much inhanced in value, how- lars, as to shape and figure, we refer ever diminished in enjoyment, by the you to the Venus of Canova, very few people whom she allowed to “Remember," said the old lady as share it. For heaven, according to they-parted at the little foot-bridge, some notions, is something like a re. “ that I consider your conduct highly ligious tea-meeting, to which only a blameable, and" very small and select party can be ad. “Conduct, grand-aunt?" mitted; where the share of the toast “ In fishing, I mean. That man and muffins that falls to each is com- Yarrel that you study so much, and putable by simple division; and where the wretch called Christopher North each has, therefore, an interest in keep with his rhapsodies in praise of fish

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