And therefore 't is no wonder if we see
They dote on dowdies and deformity.
Ev'n what they cannot praise, they will not
blame,

But veil with some extenuating name.
The sallow skin is for the swarthy put,
And love can make a slattern of a slut;
If cat-ey'd, then a Pallas is their love;
If freckled, she's a party-color'd dove;
If little, then she's life and soul all o'er;
An Amazon, the large two-handed whore.
She stammers: 0, what grace in lisping

Meantime, excluded, and expos'd to cold,
The whining lover stands before the gates,
And there with humble adoration waits;
Crowning with flow'rs the threshold and
the floor,

And printing kisses on th' obdurate door;
Who, if admitted in that nick of time,
If some unsav'ry whiff betray the crime,
Invents a quarrel straight, if there be none,
Or makes some faint excuses to be gone;
And calls himself a doting fool to serve,
Ascribing more than woman can deserve.
Which well they understand, like cunning
queans,

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And hide their nastiness behind the scenes, From him they have allur'd, and would retain;

But to a piercing eye 't is all in vain: For common sense brings all their cheats to view,

And the false light discovers by the true; Which a wise harlot owns, and hopes to

To bless the show'ry seed with future life,
And to impregnate the well-labor'd wife.
In vain they weary Heav'n with prayer, or
fly

To oracles, or magic numbers try;
For barrenness of sexes will proceed
Either from too condens'd, or wat'ry seed:
The wat'ry juice too soon dissolves away,
And in the parts projected will not stay; 250
The too condens'd, unsoul'd, unwieldy mass,
Drops short, nor carries to the destin'd
place;

Nor pierces to the parts, nor, tho' injected home,

Will mingle with the kindly moisture of the womb.

For nuptials are unlike in their success; Some men with fruitful seed some women bless,

And from some men some women fruitful are,

Just as their constitutions join or jar:
And many seeming barren wives have been,
Who after, match'd with more prolific men,
Have fill'd a family with prattling boys; 261
And many, not supplied at home with joys,
Have found a friend abroad to ease their
smart,

And to perform the sapless husband's part.
So much it does import that seed with seed
Should of the kindly mixture make the
breed;

And thick with thin, and thin with thick should join,

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So to produce and propagate the line.
Of such concernment too is drink and food,
T'incrassate, or attenuate the blood.
Of like importance is the posture too,
In which the genial feat of love we do;
For, as the females of the four-foot kind
Receive the leapings of their males behind,
So the good wives, with loins uplifted high,
And leaning on their hands, the fruitful
stroke may try:

For in that posture will they best conceive; Not when, supinely laid, they frisk and heave;

For active motions only break the blow, And more of strumpets than of wives they show,

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When, answering stroke with stroke, the mingled liquors flow.

Endearments eager, and too brisk a bound, Throws off the plowshare from the furrow'd ground.

Has Somnus brush'd thy eyelids with his rod,

Or do thy legs refuse to bear their load With flowing bowls of a more generous god?

If gentle slumber on thy temples creep, (But, naughty man, thou dost not mean to sleep,)

20

Betake thee to thy bed, thou drowsy drone Sleep by thyself, and leave thy bride alone Go, leave her with her maiden mates to play At sports more harmless, till the break of day:

Give us this evening; thou hast morn and night,

And all the year before thee, for delight.
O happy youth! to thee, among the crowd
Of rival princes, Cupid sneez'd aloud;
And every lucky omen sent before,
To meet thee landing on the Spartan shore.
Of all our heroes thou canst boast alone 31
That Jove, whene'er he thunders, calls thee

son.

With whom no Grecian virgin can compare;

So soft, so sweet, so balmy, and so fair.
A boy, like thee, would make a kingly line;
But O, a girl like her must be divine.
Her equals we, in years, but not in face,
Twelvescore viragoes of the Spartan race,
While naked to Eurotas' banks we bend, 40
And there in manly exercise contend,
When she appears, are all eclips'd and lost,
And hide the beauties that we made our
boast.

So, when the night and winter disappear,
The purple Morning, rising with the year,
Salutes the Spring, as her celestial eyes
Adorn the world, and brighten all the
skies:

So beauteous Helen shines among the rest, Tall, slender, straight, with all the graces blest.

As pines the mountains, or as fields the

Our noblest maids shall to thy name bequeath

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The boughs of lotos, form'd into a wreath. This monument, thy maiden beauties' due, High on a plane tree shall be hung to view; On the smooth rind the passenger shall see Thy name ingrav'd, and worship Helen's tree;

Balm, from a silver box distill'd around, Shall all bedew the roots, and scent the sacred ground.

The balm, 't is true, can aged plants prolong,

But Helen's name will keep it ever young. "Hail bride, hail bridegroom, son-in-law

to Jove!

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With fruitful joys Latona bless your love! Let Venus furnish you with full desires, Add vigor to your wills, and fuel to your fires!

Almighty Jove augment your wealthy store,

Give much to you, and to his grandsons more !

From generous loins a generous race will spring;

Each girl, like her, a queen; each boy, like you, a king.

Now sleep, if sleep you can; but while you rest,

Sleep close, with folded arms, and breast to breast.

Rise in the morn; but O! before you rise,

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Forget not to perform your morning sacri

His person hated, and his gifts despis'd;
Nor knew the force of Cupid's cruel darts,
Nor fear'd his awful pow'r on human hearts;
But either from her hopeless lover fled,
Or with disdainful glances shot him dead. 10
No kiss, no look, to cheer the drooping boy;
No word she spoke, she scorn'd ev❜n to deny.
But, as a hunted panther casts about
Her glaring eyes, and pricks her list'ning
ears to scout,

So she, to shun his toils, her cares imploy'd,

And fiercely in her savage freedom joy'd. Her mouth she writh'd, her forehead taught to frown,

Her eyes to sparkle fires to love unknown: Her sallow cheeks her envious mind did show,

And every feature spoke aloud the curstness of a shrew.

20

Yet could not he his obvious fate escape; His love still dress'd her in a pleasing

shape;

And every sullen frown, and bitter scorn, But fann'd the fuel that too fast did burn. Long time, unequal to his mighty pain,

He strove to curb it, but he strove in vain: At last his woes broke out, and begg'd relief

With tears, the dumb petitioners of grief; With tears so tender, as adorn'd his love, And any heart, but only hers, would

Trembling before her bolted doors he stood, And there pour'd out th' unprofitable flood: Staring his eyes, and haggard was his look; Then, kissing first the threshold, thus he spoke:

"Ah, nymph, more cruel than of human race!

Thy tigress heart belies thy angel face: Too well thou show'st thy pedigree from stone;

Thy grandame's was the first by Pyrrha thrown:

Unworthy thou to be so long desir'd;
But so my love, and so my fate requir'd.
I beg not now (for 't is in vain) to live; 41
But take this gift, the last that I can give.
This friendly cord shall soon decide the
strife

Betwixt my ling'ring love and loathsome life:

This moment puts an end to all my pain; I shall no more despair, nor thou disdain.