The scouring drunkard, if he does not fight
Before his bedtime, takes no rest that night.
Passing the tedious hours in greater pain
Than stern Achilles 30, when his friend was slain :
"Tis so ridiculous, but so true withal,

A bully cannot sleep without a brawl:

Yet though his youthful blood be fired with wine,
He wants not wit the danger to decline:
Is cautious to avoid the coach and six,
And on the lackeys will no quarrel fix.
His train of flambeaux, and embroider'd coat,
May privilege my lord to walk secure on foot:
But me, who must by moonlight homeward bend,
Or lighted only with a candle's end,

Poor me he fights, if that be fighting, where
He only cudgels, and I only bear.

He stands, and bids me stand: I must abide;
For he's the stronger, and is drunk beside.

• Where did you whet your knife to-night (he cries),

And shred the leeks that in your stomach rise? Whose windy beans have stuff'd your guts, and

where

Have your black thumbs been dipp'd in vinegar?
With what companion cobbler have you fed,
On old ox-cheeks, or he goat's tougher head?
What, are you dumb? quick, with your answer,
Before my foot salutes you with a kick. [quick;
Say, in what nasty cellar under ground,

Or what church-porch, your rogueship may be found?'

30 Stern Achilles.' The friend of Achilles was Patroclus, who was slain by Hector.

Answer, or answer not, 'tis all the same:

He lays me on, and makes me bear the blame.
Before the bar, for beating him, you come;
This is a poor man's liberty in Rome.
You beg his pardon; happy to retreat
With some remaining teeth to chew your meat.
Nor is this all: for, when retired, you think
To sleep securely; when the candles wink,
When every door with iron chains is barr'd,
And roaring taverns are no longer heard;
The ruffian robbers, by no justice awed,
And unpaid cut-throat soldiers, are abroad.
Those venal souls, who, hardened in each ill,
To save complaints and prosecution, kill:
Chased from their woods and bogs, the padders
To this vast city, as their native home;
To live at ease, and safely skulk in Rome.
The forge in fetters only is employ'd;
Our iron mines exhausted and destroy'd
In shackles; for these villains scarce allow
Goads for the teams, and ploughshares for the
Oh! happy ages of our ancestors,

[come

[plough. Beneath the kings 3 and tribunitial powers!

31

One gaol did all their criminals restrain;

Which now the walls of Rome can scarce contain. More I could say, more causes I could show For my departure; but the sun is low:

31 Beneath the kings, &c.' Rome was originally ruled by kings; till, for the rape of Lucretia, Tarquin the Proud was expelled after which it was governed by two consuls yearly chosen; but they oppressing the people, the commoners mutinied, and procured Tribunes to be created, who defended their privileges, and often opposed the consular authority and the senate.

The wagoner grows weary of my stay;

And whips his horses forwards on their way.
Farewell! and when like me o'erwhelm'd with care,
You to your own Aquinum 32 shall repair,
To take a mouthful of sweet country air,
Be mindful of your friend; and send me word
What joys your fountains and cool shades afford:
Then to assist your satires I will come,
And add new venom when you write of Rome.

32 Aquinum was the birthplace of Juvenal.

JUVENA L.

SATIRE IV.

BY THE REV. RICHARD DUKE.

The Argument.

The poet in this Satire first brings in Crispinus, whom he had a lash at in his first Satire, and whom he promises here not to be forgetful of for the future. He exposes his monstrous prodigality and luxury in giving the price of an estate for a barbel; and from thence takes occasion to introduce the principal subject and true design of this Satire, which is grounded upon a ridiculous story of a turbot presented to Domitian, of so vast a bigness that all the emperor's scullery had not a dish large enough to hold it. Upon which, the Senate, in all haste, is summoned to consult in this exigency, what is fittest to be done. The poet gives us a particular of the Senators' names, their distinct characters, and speeches, and advice; and, after much and wise consultation, an expedient being found out and agreed upon, he dismisses the Senate, and concludes the Satire.

ONCE more Crispinus, call'd upon the stage
(Nor shall once more suffice), provokes my rage;
A monster, to whom every vice lays claim,
Without one virtue to redeem his fame.
Feeble and sick, yet strong in lust alone,
The rank adulterer preys on all the town;
All but the widow's nauseous charms go down.

VOL. I.

P

What matter then how stately is the arch Where his tired mules slow with their burden

march?

What matter then how thick and long the shade
Through which, by sweating slaves, he is convey'd?
How many acres near the city walls,

Or new-built palaces, his own he calls?
No ill man's happy: least of all is he
Whose study 'tis to corrupt chastity;

The' incestuous brute, who the veil'd vestal maid
But lately to his impious bed betray'd;

Who for her crime, if laws their course might have, Ought to descend' alive into the grave.

But now of slighter faults; and yet the same, By others done, the censor's justice claim. For what good men ignoble count and base Is virtue here, and does Crispinus grace: In this he's safe, whate'er we write of him, The person is more odious than the crime: And so all satire's lost. The lavish slave Six thousand pieces' for a barbel gave: A sesterce for each pound it weigh'd (as they Give out that hear great things, but greater say). If by this bribe well placed, he would ensnare Some sapless usurer that wants an heir; Or if this present the sly courtier meant, Should to some punk of quality be sent,

1 If laws their course- -ought to descend,' &c.-Crispinus had deflowered a vestal virgin; but by his favour with Domitian, she escaped the punishment due to her offence, which was to be buried alive by Numa's law, as may be seen in Livy, 1. 1. and is more particularly described in Plutarch's Life of Numa.

2. Six thousand pieces.' Six thousand of the Roman sestertii, which makes six sestertia; according to our account, 461. 17s. 6d.