Ceed, I have any at all, and am not than ever before. I determined to deceiving myself with the hope of spend this day, in reviewing my past the hypocrite which shall perish." life; in contemplating the divine At another time, he writes thus: mercies to me; in calling to mind "If I am not deceived, I have an my sins against God with humiliaabiding, fixed hope and trust in tion and prayer; and in renewing Christ, his fullness, and the all-suffi- the surrender of myself and my all ciency of atonement and righteous- to him as my God and Redeemer. ness that there is in him, though too The Lord guide my meditations, dioften mixed and clouded with dis-rect and fix my resolutions, and give tressing darkness, doubts, and fears, through remains of native or contracted corruption, which causes me often to cry out, Oh wretched man that I am; who shall deliver me In prayer, he manifested a distinfrom the body of this death. Thanks guished fervor of devotion, a strikbe to God for Jesus Christ. Whithering adaptation of thought to the subshall I flee, but to Jesus the Gospel refuge." me grace to spend and be spent in his service, to fill up the residue of my days, with usefulness and duty." jects, and a dignity and propriety of expression not commonly excelled. It is more precious than the most fine gold, sweeter than the honey comb, and more important than my necessary food. It is daily my de He was eminently a man of prayer. Another thing to be noticed of him This he considered as the great du- was, his great love to the word of ty of the Christian life, and the God. This he read daily, for the dimost important means of daily in-rect purpose of personal devotion, tercourse with heaven. Besides his and spiritual improvement, in disordinary seasons, he employed, in tinction from its use in the family, and self-examination and prayer, the an- in his professional employment. "If iversary of his birth, the first day in I am not greatly deceived, indeed, the year, and other days which he oc- said he, in conversation, I can adopt casionally separated for fasting, and the language of the Psalmist and of special exercises of devotion. On one Job, concerning the sweetness, and of these occasions, he writes thus:-preciousness of the word of God. "Oh, that I may be enabled wisely to observe and improve the dealings of Providence towards me and mine, and to conduct suitably thereto. Though I have repeatedly, and more frequent-light. ly than usual, renewed my resolu- The Sabbath and public worship tions to be the Lord's since the com- were peculiarly dear to him. On mencement of this year; yet, alas! the day before the Sabbath he took I find a lato in my members, war-care that every possible preparation ring against the law of my mind. should be made; so that the holy The good that I would I do not ; but work of that day might not be inthe evil that I would not, that I terrupted, by secular concerns. It do." was his care to preserve a serious "Jan. 1. 1762. Through the won- and heavenly frame of mind, through derful goodness and forbearance of the day; and for this purpose, he God, I am brought to the beginning vigilantly guarded his thoughts, his of another year. He hath taken speech, and his conduct. He was one from my family, and given anoth- unwilling to receive company, on the er. Oh, that I might be taught to pro- Sabbath; because it diverted his fit, both by afflictions and mercies; mind from those contemplations, in and may the thought, that I have which he chose to be engaged; and one year more to account for, and he was exceedingly grieved, whenone year less to live, have a quicken-éver his pleasures of the Sabbath ing influence on my soul, to greater diligence and fidelity, in duty and fruitfulness in God's vineyard." were interrupted. It appears to have been his constant practice to mark down the frame of mind, in which he spent that holy day. His delight in public worship was manifested, by his extraordinary diliGgg prepare and ripen me for that rest, which remaineth in heaven for the people of God." He was very particular in noticing the dispensations of Providence. It was a maxim with him, to eye the Divine hand in every event. gence, in going to the house of God, during the last ten years of his life; when it was no longer necessary for him to attend, as the acting pas- Family religion, as it might be extor, and when the multiplied infirmi-pected of him, from what has been ties of age seemed to form a fair ex-said, was a privilege which he highcuse for his absence. Sometimes, ly prized. He had his children in when his friends thought it improper subjection with all gravity, and he for him to go out, and when he him- was diligent to bring them up in the self acknowledged that it seemed as nurture and admonition of the Lord. though he could not go; still his love His house was a house of prayer, to the place where the divine honor and it was matter of lamentation dwells, would prevail over the infir- with him, whenever infirmity made mities of the flesh, and he would re- it necessary to omit the united worturn, refreshed by the exercises, and ship of God in his household; and enlivened by communion with God. urgency of business he would not He would say, "I know not how admit, as a good cause for neglect. few my Sabbaths may be, and I am But amidst all his decay, he was unwilling that any thing, but neces-enabled to continue family prayer, sity, should deprive me of the public until within a day, or two of his privileges of one; and I believe that death. necessity is often pleaded as an excuse, where it does not exist." He was more delighted in the performances of other ministers, than in his own; and often wrote animating accounts of the pleasure he found in the public services of his brethren. In the most uncomfortable weather, when almost all the people thought themselves excused from the house of God, he would be there; nor was he entirely prevented, until within a few months of his death.-The following extracts from his writings may give a specimen of his views and feelings on this subject: "How amiable are thy tabernacles, O Lord of Hosts! Truly, a day in thy courts is better" May God help me quietly to rethan a thousand. What a blessed sign her into his all-gracious hand; institution is the Christian Sabbath! and Oh, that, when creature-streams I find it good for me to draw near are failing, my soul may have reto God, and to wait upon him in his course to the infinite Fountain, and sanctuary. Blessed be his name, for find a satisfying fulness in God."his word, Sabbaths, and sacraments, She died Oct. 29, 1773. "Oh, how and for the continued and unmolest- deeply does the arrow of divine aned enjoyment of these precious pri-ger pierce my heart with grief. The vileges." "September 17, 1809. The Sabbath, as I get nearer the grave, grows sweeter, more delightful, more improving, and refreshing, and appears a most wise and gracious institution. Blessed be the Lord, that, as yet, I am able, with few interruptions, to seek and wait upon him, in his sanctuary, on his holy day. Oh, may this precious season, and the ordinances of divine worship be, indeed, more and more blessed, to He was a man patient under afflictions, and earnestly desirous that they might have a gracious operation upon his mind. Twice was he called to follow the desire of his eyes, and six times, his beloved offspring to the land of silence. In these, and other tribulations, he learned submission to the righteous providence of God. He passed through a heavy trial, in the long distress, and death of his first wife. In expectation of the event, he thus prays desire of y eyes, my dearest creature-comfort is taken from me; but let me not repine; for it is God's sovereign right to take, as well as give. If earthly delights fail, if created streams are dried up; yet the fountain remains full. Oh, thither let me repair, and satisfy my mind. Blessed be God, for so long an enjoyment of so dear and pleasant a companion. May the loss be made up in spiritual gain, to me and my poor children. Oh, for divine grace, that I may present to Godness and resignation, which he had the sacrifice of a broken and con- learned in a long life of trial. "I trite heart, and come forth purified had promised myself,' said he, from the furnace of affliction; that "much comfort in that son, too I may mourn, without repining, and much ;....God has wisely and graso as to find divine comfort from a ciously taken him away. 1 had sealed pardon." looked upon him, as the stay of my age, and the support of my declining years; but God is wise and righteous, and has a right to rule, and dispose of all his creatures. The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord. Alas! lover and friend have forsaken me; but Christ lives; God remains the same all-sufficient Being. His charitable donations, though concealed, from principle, while he lived, yet may now with propriety, be brought into view. When he saw the needy, he never sent them away empty. The indigent bless his mem In the decline of his other wife, it was his great concern that his mind and hers might be prepared for the event, and be submissive to the divine will. 66 May a gracious God accomplish his own work in, and for her, and bring her will cheerfully to submit to his, and prepare her and me for whatever that may be." A short time before her death, when her mind was disordered, he said; "Oh, that she might have the exercise of reason, before she leaves us; if not, God's will be done, and may we submit, and be fitted for that; only let her find mercy, in the day of the Lord. When her son first ap-ory. He felt a deep concern for the peared, after a long absence, which advancement of the Gospel-kingdom, was a day or two before her death, and gave liberally for the propagashe seemed, for a moment, as awa- tion of Christian knowledge. The ked from sleep, clasped him and writer of this article has been inforcried, "My child"- -after which she med, by a gentleman in the vicinity, took no more notice of him, or any who was made a secret agent in the other. She expired, Aug. 21, 1801, business, that he had made an annuwithout a groan or struggle, and is al donation, of ten dollars to the Misgone, I hope, to perfect, everlasting sionary Society of Connecticut, since rest and peace. At this moment he the formation of that institution. In said, "It is God that hath done it; contributions his example was liberI am dumb and open not my mouth." al. He did considerable, in aid of the His after reflections may be seen Tract Society, of New Haven. He from the following example: "How gave $100 to the funds of the Newfleeting are creature-comforts!-ington Cent Society; and & 50 to the Worldly joys, how transient! What Connecticut Bible Society. is life? A vapor. Boast not thyself of to-morrow. To-day hear the voice of wisdom. Do with thy might what thy hand findeth to do. The Lord make me to know wherefore he contends with me, and let the fruit be the taking away of sin, and making me a partaker of his holiness." He was diligent, in the employment of his time. He rose early in the morning, and soon retired to his study, where he spent some time in devotion, as a suitable introduction to the business of the day. Indeed his study was his favorite spot. "Here," said he," is the place where I have enjoyed the greatest comfort, and In May, 1808, his children being where I have spent the greater part all removed from him, he left his of my life." Being in easy circumown house, and entered the family stances, from the beginning of his of his son, Joshua Belden, Esq. with course, he was enabled to cominand the expectation of spending the re- his time, according to his pleasure; mainder of his days with him. Ina and also, to furnish himself, with few days after his settlement in this whatever books he chose; a prifamily, his son died; which over-vilege, in which he was distinguishturned all his expectations. This was one of the greatest afflictions of his life. He bore it with that calm ed, above most of his brethren, who are condemned, by the scantiness of their income, to a dearth of books, over the land, and poured out ear nest and abundant prayers, for the prosperity of the United States. He read, with avidity, the religious pe riodical works of the day, and was in the early part of their ministry, the very season when they are best qualified to reap advantage from them, and to prepare for a more able ministration to their hearers, He was able in counsel. The evi-highly animated, with the religious dence of this is to be found, in the intelligence which he found; for multiplied instances of difficulty, in nothing so delighted him, as to learn which he was called to give advice, the revivals of religion, and the dif and from which it appears, that fusion of Christian instruction. none, in his day, had greater confidence reposed in them. And this confidence was well founded; for he had an ardent concern for the welfare of the churches, and his judg-he, it is every day in my thoughts; ment was sound, as it was the result of experience, and of conscientious, thorough investigation. In these last years of his life, he seemed to be engaged in nothing, but preparation for eternity. for the great event of death," said and though, when I bring it nearest, my nature seems to revolt; yet I have, ordinarily, no fears or terror at its approach. I desire to spend my whole time in contemplating futurity, and waiting for the coming of my Lord." His favorite books, in his last years, were the Bible, the Abridgment of Henry on Prayer, by the North Consociation of Hartford County, and the Hartford Selection of Hymns. These lay constantly upon his table. The Assembly's Cat echism, he said, was one of the greatest sources of comfort to him, It is to be observed, that he was a man of peculiar diffidence. Instead of showing to the best advantage, he always kept himself back, and placed more confidence in others, than in himself; which concealed from the superficial observer, many of the solid excellencies of his mind. This diffidence often subjected him to embarrassment, in his public services, especially, in the presence of strangers. We often find him abasing himself, and chas-" in his wakeful hours of night," as tising, in the severest terms, his performances, in other congregations than his own, and complain ing of his "old infirmity," which it seemed impossible for him to surmount, and by which he was some times extremely depressed. He preached, for the last time, and adininistered the Lord's Supper, Nov. 6, 1803. During the ten years that followed, it was an important work with him to give private warnings and admonitions, on the salvation of the soul, as he had opportunity; and, for this purpose, he visited, abundantly, the dwellings of his people, and none who visited him were suffered to go away empty. He was a preacher of righteousness to the last, and was anxious to do all he could for the salvation of men. He had a colleague ordained, January 16, 1805. He felt a strong concern for his country, and for Zion, and this seemed to increase, rather than abate, as he drew near the close of his life. He was greatly distressed at the judgments which he saw hanging it gave a lead to his meditations, when his powers were so broken, that he could not command and arrange his thoughts, at pleasure. This he learned to repeat, in his childhood, and retained to the end of his life, which he considered as matter of special gratitude, as it furnished him with subjects of contemplation, on all the important points in theology; and he used to say, that he often went through the whole of it, in the course of the night These are but faint notices of the man, whose example shone as a light in the world, and whose reme-. val has left a great vacancy, in the church militant. One of the most aged and respectable ministers in the State, being asked what char acter he would give of Mr. Belden, replied; "I have ever looked upon him as a worthy, good man; correct in his theological sentiments; and a pungent, powerful preacher." It only remains now, to give some account of the close of his life. It does not appear that he was ever visited with very hard and danger ous illness. In October, 1792, as heed to leave the world?" Yes; was standing about four feet from though I am not wholly without my the ground, for the purpose of gath-fears. There is a possibility of deering fruit, he received a shock ception; yet I have such views as which threw him to the earth, where to raise me in a good measure, above he remained some minutes insensi- its terrors." To a neighbor he said, ble. From this time, he was afflic-"I am not able to talk much with ted, with a vertiginous, disorder, you, I am glad you have come to which sometimes, interrupted his see me once more, I pray that God public ministrations. About a year may be your teacher. One thing I and a half before his death, he was would say to you; remember that seized with a convulsion, which the the world will serve us. but a little, physician considered to be apoplec- while;, and there is an eternity be-. tic, and which was thought to indi- fore us, in which we shall be un cate the manner of his death, but speakably happy or miserable, acit proved otherwise. cording as, we spend our present time. I pray that God may make you experimentally acquainted with his truth, and give you peace." Then (taking him by the hand) “so, Ibid you farewell." After, this he spake of the prosperity of the Church, and of Zion at large, and in a very feeling manner, of the present state of our country. Of the Millennium he said, "I look upon. it as near, but do not expect to see it. I hope to be in a state more blessed than the Millennium itself." In about an hour he expired; and, is, we trust, rejoicing in the presence of God. His mind was clear to the last. His sun set without a cloud. In September, 1812, that he might have every thing in readiness to leave the world, he chose to make an arrangement of his temporal concerns; and accordingly, distributed his property among his heirs, retaining such funds in his hands, and such a hold upon the whole, as to give security and satisfaction to himself, and when he had read the deed of confirmation, exclaimed, "Now I am happy; I have done with the world." He was confined, at last, but one day; and though he labored under infirmities more, as he used to say, than he could name; yet he seemed to be affected by no bodily disease. His appetite was good to the last hour. The machine was worn out by time. ·་ -- Thursday morning, 22d July, he was much exhausted by the exercise of rising. After he had rested a few minutes, he conversed freely,"I have felt," said he, "greater comfort and satisfaction in religion, these two days past, than ever I did. There is an all-sufficiency in Christ. I rest in him. He is my hope, and happiness. I think I can say, I know whom I have believed, and am persuaded that he is able to keep that which I have committed to him, against that day. I pray God, that I may not be deceived. I am willing to die, Ilong, for it." He passed that day, and the next in quietness. Friday, July 23d, 1813. At evening, he was asked whether he thought himself drawing near the close. He answered, "I feel that I am gradually." Are you content ORDINATIONS. On Wednesday the 20th October last, the Rev. JOHN HART FOWLER was ordained to the work of the Gospel Ministry at Lebanon, Exeter, Third Society. The exercises were as follows: First prayer by the Rev. Shubael Bartlett, of EastWindsor; sermon by Rev. Moses C. Welch, D. D. of Mansfield, from Acts iv. 19, "Whether it be right in the sight of God to hearken unto you more than unto God, judge ye." Consecrating prayer by the Rev. Zebulon Ely, of Lebanon; Charge to the Pastor, by the Rev. Samuel Nott, of Franklin; Right-hand of fellowship, by the Rev. Thomas Rich, of Columbia; Charge to the church and congregation, by the Rev. Amos Basset, of Hebron; Concluding prayer, by the Rev. Walian B. Ripley, of Lebanon, |