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berwell' and Wandsworth are fast going the way of all fairs. Bow, Edmonton,3 Highgate, West-end (Hampstead5), and Brook Green (Hammersmith) Fairs, with their swings, roundabouts, spiced gingerbread, penny-trumpets, and halfpenny rattles are passed away. The showmen and Merry Andrews of Moorfields are no more; the

1 A petty session (how very petty!) was held at Union Hall on the 4th July, 1823, in order to put down Camberwell Fair, which is as old as Domesday Book. Shakspere has truly described these ill-conditioned, peddling, meddling Dogberry's. "You wear out a good wholesome forenoon in hearing a cause between an orangewife and a fosset-seller; and then rejourn the controversy of three-pence to a second day of audience. When you speak best to the purpose, it is not worth the wagging of your beards, and your beards deserve not so honourable a grave, as to stuff a botcher's cushion, or to be entombed in an ass's pack-saddle."

2 Wandsworth Fair exhibited sixty years ago, Mount Vesuvius, or the burning mountain by moonlight, rope, and hornpipe-dancing; a forest, with the humours of lion-catching; tumbling by the young Polander from Sadler's Wells; several diverting comic songs; a humorous dialogue between Mr. Swatchall and his wife; sparring matches; the Siege of Belgrade, &c. all for three-pence!

On Whit-Monday, 1840, Messrs. Nelson and Lee sent down a theatrical caravan to Wandsworth Fair, and were moderately remunerated. But the "Grand Victoria Booth "was the rallying point of attraction. Its refectory was worthy of the ubiquitous Mr. Epps of ham, beef, tongue, polony, portable soup, and sheep's trotter memory!

Cold beef and ham, hot ribs of lamb, mock-turtle soup that's portable,

Did blow, with stout, their jackets out, and made the folks comfort-able!

In the year 1820, the keeper of a menagerie at Edmonton Fair walked into the den of a lioness, and nursed her cubs. He then paid his respects to the husband and father, a magnificent Barbary Lion. After the usual complimentary greetings between them, the man somewhat roughly thrust open the monster's jaws, and put his head into its mouth, giving at the same time a shout that made it tremble. This he did with impunity. But in less than two months afterwards, when repeating the same exhibition at a fair in the provinces, he cried, like the starling, “I can't get out!-I can't get out!" demanding at the same time if the lion wagged its tail? The lion, thinking the joke had been played quite often enough, did wag its tail, and roared "Heads!" The keeper fell a victim to his temerity.

✦ “July 2, 1744.-This is to give notice that Highgate Fair will be kept on Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday next, in a pleasant shady walk in the middle of the town.

“On Wednesday a pig will be turned loose, and he that takes it up by the tail and throws it over his head, shall have it. To pay two-pence entrance, and no less than twelve to enter.

"On Thursday a match will be run by two men, a hundred yards in two sacks, for a large sum. And, to encourage the sport, the landlord at the Mitre will give a pair of gloves, to be run for by six men, the winner to have them.

"And on Friday a hat, value ten shillings, will be run for by men twelve times round the Green; to pay one shilling entrance: no less than four to start; as many as will may enter, and the second man to have all the money above four. No one to be entitled to the hat that never won that value."

"The Hampstead Fair Ramble; or, The World going quite Mad. To the -tune of Brother Soldier dost hear of the News.' London: Printed for J. Bland, near Holbourn, 1708." A curious broadside.

Moorfields, during holiday seasons was an epitome of Bartlemy Fair. Its booths and scaffold had flags flying on the top. A stage near the Windmill Tavern, opposite Old Bethlem, was famous for its grinning-matches. Moorfields had one novel peculiarity, viz. that whilst the Merry Andrew was practising his buffooneries and legerdemain tricks in one quarter, the itinerant Methodist preacher was holding forth in another. Foote makes his ranting parson exclaim,

VOL. IX.

"Near the mad mansions of Moorfields I'll bawl,
Come fathers, mothers, brothers, sisters, all,
Shut up your shops, and listen to my call!"

D

Gooseberry Fairs of Clerkenwell and Tottenham Court Road, (the minor Newmarket and Doncaster of Donkey-racing !) are come to a brick-and-mortary end. High-smoking chimneys and acres of tiles shut out the once pleasant prospect, and their Geffray Gambados (now grey-headed jockeys!) sigh, amidst macadamisation and dust, for the green sward where in their hey-day of life they witched the fair with noble donkeyship!-Croydon (famous for roast-pork

The Act 12 of Queen Anne aimed at the suppression of the Moorfields' merriments. The showmen asked Justice Fuller to license them in April, 1717, but in vain. Fuller had a battle-royal with Messrs. Saunders and Margaret, two Middlesex justices, who sided with the conjurers, and forbade the execution of his warrant. Justice Fuller, however, having declared war against Moorfields mountebanking, was inexorable, and committed the insurgents to the house of correction; from whence, after three hours' durance vile they were released by three other magistrates.

Kennington Common was also a favourite spot for this odd variety of sports. It was here that Mr. Mawworm encountered the brick-bats of his congregation, and had his "pious tail" illuminated with the squibs and crackers of the unregenerate. 1 This fair commenced in the New River pipe-fields, and continued in a direct line as far as the top of Elm Street, where it terminated. The equestrians always made a point of galloping their donkeys furiously past the house of correction.

2 April 9, 1748.-At the Amphitheatrical Booth at Tottenham Court, on Monday next (being Easter Monday), Mr. French, designing to please all, in making his Country Wake complete, by doubling the prizes given to be played for, as well as the sports, has already engaged some of the best gamesters, "Country against London, to make sides. For Cudgelling, a laced hat, value one pound five shillings, or one guinea in gold; for Wrestling, one guinea; Money for Boxing, besides Stage-money. And, to crown the diversion of the day, he gives a fine Smock to be jigged for by Northern Lasses against the Nymphs to the westward of St. Giles's Church-to be entered at the Royal Oak, in High Street, by Hob, Clerk of the Revels, or his deputy. To prevent disorder, no gamester or others will be admitted without a ticket, or paying at the door. Those who engage, their money to be returned. The doors will be opened at eleven o'clock; the sport to begin at two. Cudgelling as usual before the prizes. Best seats, Two Shillings; Pit and First Gallery, One Shilling; Upper Gallery, Sixpence."

Mr. French advertises, May 12, 1748, at his booth at Tottenham Court, six men sewed up in sacks to run six times the length of the stage backwards and forwards for a prize, a prize for wrestling and dancing to the pipe and tabor, — and the gladiator's dance. He also kept the race-course on Tothill-Fields, August 4, 1749.

"August 8, 1730. - At Reynolds' Great Theatrical Booth, in Tottenham Court, during the time of the Fair, will be presented a Comical, Tragical, Farcical Droll, called The Rum Duke and the Queer Duke, or a Medley of Mirth and Sorrow. To which will be added, a celebrated Operatical Puppet-Show, called Punch's Oratory, or the Pleasures of the Town; containing several diverting passages, particularly a very elegant dispute between Punch and another great Orator (Henley?); Punch's Family Lecture, or Joan's Chimes on her tongue to some tune. Wires-all alive! With entertainments of Dancing by Monsieur St. Luce, and others."

No

"At the London Spaw (1754), during the accustomed time of the Welsh Fair, will be the usual entertainment of Roast Pork, with the fam'd soft-flavor'd Spaw Ale, and every other liquor of the neatest and best kinds, agreeable entertainments, and inviting usage from the Publick's most obedient servant, George Dowdell."

Talking of Welsh Fairs, reminds us of a Dutch Fair that was held at Frogmore in the year 1795, when a grand fête was given by King George the Third, in celebration of his Queen's birth-day, and the recent arrival of the Princess of Wales. A number of dancers were dressed as haymakers; Mr. Byrne and his company danced the Morris-dance; and Savoyards, in character, assisted at the merriments. Feats of horsemanship were exhibited by professors from the Circus; and booths erected, with signs on the outside, for good eating and drinking within, and the sale of toys, work-bags, pocket-books, and fancy articles. Munden, Rock, and Incledon diverted the company with their mirth and music; and Majesty participated in the

and new walnuts!), Harley-Bush, and Barnet, are as yet unsuppressed; but the demons of mischief-[the English populace (their Majesty the Many !) are notorious for this barbarity]-have totally destroyed the magnificent oak, the growth of ages, that made Fairlop Fair' the favourite rendezvous of the better sort of holiday folks, who could afford a tandem, tax-cart, or Tim-whisky. How often have we sat, and pirouetted too, under its venerable shade.

May Fair (which began on May-day), during the early part of the last century, was much patronised by the nobility and gentry. It had nevertheless its Ducking Pond for the ruder class of holiday makers." In a fore one-pair room, on the west side of Sun-court, a Frenchman exhibited, during the time of May Fair, the astonishing strength of the Strong Woman,'' his wife." Though short, she was

general joy. The Royal Dutch Fair lasted two days, and was under the tasteful direction of the Princess Elizabeth.

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By an act passed 3rd of 2nd Victoria (not Victoria for the Fair !) it was rendered unlawful to hold Fairlop Fair beyond the first Friday ("Friday's a dry day!") in July. This was the handywork of the Barking Magistrates.

"And when I walk abroad let no dog bark!"

2 June 25, 1748.-At May Fair Ducking Pond, on Monday next, the 27th inst. Mr. Hooton's Dog Nero (a poor old dog ten years old, hardly a tooth in his head to hold a duck, but well known for his goodness to all that have seen him hunt) hunts six ducks for a guinea, against the bitch called the Flying Spaniel, from the Ducking Pond the other side of the water, who has beat all she has hunted against, excepting Mr. Hooton's Good-Blood. To begin at two o'clock.

"Mr. Hooton begs his customers won't take it amiss to pay Twopence admittance at the gate, and take a ticket, which will be allowed as Cash in their reckoning. And no person admitted without a ticket, that such as are not liked may be kept out.

"Note. Right Lincoln Ale.

"But poor old toothless Nero with his art and skill

We hope will beat the Flying Bitch against her will!”

Apropos of other mirthful rendezvous.

A new Ducking Pond to be opened on Monday next at Limehouse Cause, being the 11th August, where four dogs are to play for Four Pounds, and a lamb to be roasted whole, to be given away to all gentlemen sportsmen; and several other matches more that day. To begin at Ten o'clock in the forenoon."-Postman, 7th August 1707.

"Erith Diversion, 24th May 1790.-This is to acquaint the publick, that on Whit-Monday, and during the holidays, the undermentioned diversions will take place. First, a new Hat to be run for by men; a fine Ham to be played for at Trap-ball; a pair of new Pumps to be jumped for in a sack; a large Plumb-pudding to be sung for; a Guinea to be cudgelled for, with smoking, grinning through a collar, with many other diversions too tedious to mention.

"N.B. A Ball in the evening as usual."

But what are the hopes of man! A cruel press-gang (this is the freedom of the press with a vengeance! this the boasted monarchy of the middle classes!) interrupted and put an end to these water-side sports.

If the following Kentish gentleman ever lost his appetite, the finder of it must have been ruined. Kent has long been renowned for strong muscles and strong stomachs !

"Bromley in Kent, July 14, 1726.—A strange eating worthy is to perform a Tryal of Skill on St. James's Day, which is the day of our Fair, for a wager of Five Guineas,-viz: he is to eat four pounds of bacon, a bushel of French beans, with two pounds of butter, a quartern loaf, and to drink a gallon of strong beer."

The old proverb of "buttering bason" here receives farinaceous illustration ! This was probably Mrs. Alchorne, "who had exhibited as the Strong Woman," and died in Drury Lane in 1817, at a very advanced age. Madame also performed at Bartholomew Fair, 1752.

beautifo by formed, and of a lovely countenance. She first let down her hair a light auburn,, of a length descending to her knees, which the twisted round the projecting part of a blacksmith's anvil, and then lifted the ponderous weight from the floor. She also put her bare feet on a red-hot salamander, without receiving the least injury. May Fair is now become the site of aristocratical dwellings, where a strong purse is required to procure a standing. At Horn Fair, a party of humorists of both sexes, cornuted in all the variety of Ball-Feather fashion, after perambulating round Cuckold's-Point, startled the little quiet village of Charlton on St. Luke's day, shouting their emulation, and blowing voluntaries on rams' horns, in honour of their patron saint. Ned Ward gives a curious picture of this odd ceremony,-and the press of Stonecutter Street (the worthy successor of Aldermary Churchyard) has consigned it to immortality in two Broadsides inspired by the Helicon of the Fleet,

“Around whose brink

Bards rush in droves, like cart-horses to drink,

Dip their dark beards among its streams so clear,
And while they gulp it, wish it ale or beer,”

and illustrated by the Cruikshank of his day. Mile-end Green, in ancient times, had its popular exhibitions, which almost constituted

a fair :

"Lord Pomp, let nothing that's magnificall,

Or that may tend to London's graceful state
Be unperformed as showes and solemne feastes,
Watches in armour, triumphes, cresset-lightes,
Bonefiers, belles, and peales of ordinance.
And, Pleasure, see that plaies be published,
Maie-games and maskes, with mirth and minstrelsie;
Pageants and School-feastes, beares and puppit-plaies:
Myselfe will muster upon Mile-end-greene,

As though we saw, and feared not to be seene."

And the royal town of Windsor, and the race course in TothillFields were not without their merriments.

1 "A New Summons to all the Merry (Wagtail) Jades to attend at Horn Fair," -"A New Summons to Horn Fair," both without date, with woodcuts. 2 "The Three Lordes and Three Ladies of London," 1590.

* "On Wednesday the 13th, at Windsor, a piece of plate is to be fought for at cudgels by ten men on a side, from Berkshire and Middlesex. The next day a hat and feather to be fought for by ten men on a side, from the counties aforesaid. Ten Bargemen are to eat ten quarts of hasty-pudding, well buttered, but d-d hot! He that has done first to have a silver spoon of ten shillings value; and the second five shillings. And as they have anciently had the title of The Merry Wives of Windsor, six old women belonging to Windsor town challenge any six old women in the universe (we need not, however, go farther than our own country!) to outscold them. The best in three heats to have a suit of head-cloths, and (what old women generally want!) a pair of nut-crackers.”—Read's Journal, September 9. 1721.

"According to Law. September 22, 1749.—On Wednesday next, the 27th inst. will be run for by Asses (!!) in Tothill Fields, a purse of gold, not exceeding the value of Fifty Pounds. The first will be entitled to the gold; the second to two pads; the third to thirteen pence halfpenny; the last to a halter fit for the neck of any ass in Europe. Each ass must be subject to the following articles :--

"No person will be allowed to ride but Taylors and Chimney-sweepers; the for

37

OPINIONS OF THE "TIMES."

BY HAL WILLIS.

THE Cobbler declares the times want "mending,"-that his "little awl" is insufficient to support him, although he is the "last" to complain.

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The watchmakers say their watches "don't go," and they shall be "wound up" if the “ spring" does not produce a movement." Even the undertakers complain that their trade is "dead ;" and the little ale-brewers, that everything in their line is "flat, stale, and unprofitable." Cabinet-makers are compelled to return their bills to their "drawers ;" and chair-manufacturers vow they have not a "leg to stand on.”

Bed-manufacturers say these are not times for "feathering their nests," and that they are obliged to "bolster up" their business by getting "tick" wherever they can.

The trunk-makers, when others talk of distress, hold up their hands and cry, "they never saw such a deal," and that they daily see more cases of distress than packing-cases!

The little wine-merchant declares, like the "cabin-boy," that he is "wrecked in sight of port!"

The poulterer, that purchasing stock is really making "ducks and drakes" of his money, for all his customers are "on the wing."

The rope-maker finds "spinning a long yarn" as unprofitable as an author's writing "wonderful tales" without the prospect of a publisher, and thinks seriously of making a rope for himself.

The hackney-coachman says that the omnibuses have run away with his customers, and that his vocation is all at a— -stand!

Ask the market-gardener "How are turnips?" or "How are potatoes?" and he answers that they are Flat-very flat.”

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And thus it is with every calling and profession. Some have recourse to emigration, and, of course, many journey-men become travellers from necessity.

The philosophers say there is no such thing as colour, yet the times certainly look black, and everybody looks blue.

The want of money is undoubtedly universal, and the smallest change would be acceptable.

mer to have a cabbage-leaf fixed to his hat, the latter a plumage of white feathers; the one to use nothing but his yard-wand, and the other a brush.

"No jockey-tricks, too commonly practised, will be allowed upon any consideration.

"No one to strike an ass but the rider, lest he thereby cause a retrograde motion, under a penalty of being ducked three times in the river.

"No ass will be allowed to start above thirty years old, or under ten months, nor any that has won above the value of fifty pounds.

"No ass to run that has been six months in training, particularly above stairs, lest the same accident happen to it that did to one nigh a town ten miles from London, and that for reasons well known to that place.

"Each ass to pay sixpence entrance, three farthings of which are to be given to the old clerk of the race, for his due care and attendance.

“Every ass to carry weight for inches, if thought proper."

Then follow a variety of sports, with "an ordinary of proper victuals, particularly for the riders, if desired."

"Run, lads, run! there's rare sport in Tothill Fields!"

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