Sidor som bilder
PDF
ePub

could not bear it. I thought the exacerbation of the disease would pass off with a little rest, and so I believe it will in time. Now, however, it is all well, I am very thankful to be in the midst of my family; only, I grieve for the trouble I give you all: and the dear children too, poor little loves. I cannot bear them now; but my dear boy Mason must come to me by and by.'

"On Friday December 29th, as you have already remarked, Mr. Cooper held a consultation with Dr. Good, who saw and wrote a prescription with his usual accuracy for his patient, the niece of his much loved and greatly esteemed friend, the Rev. Mr. Russell, rector of the parish. A more striking scene can scarcely be conceived-The young lady, who was extremely ill, and supposed to be in immediate danger, was, at her own earnest request, brought into the house, and placed by the bed-side of her kind physician, who gathered up all his strength to attend to her symptoms, which were stated with extreme difficulty. At this time his own danger began to be apprehended by his afflicted family, and the friends of both parties listened, with no common interest, to what was passing before them. The exertion, however, was far too much for Dr. Good. The excitement, it produced, occasioned through the whole of the same night and succeeding day much confusion of thought.

"In the evening of Saturday Dec. 30th, he was once more completely himself; and this being observed, Mr. Russell was sent for. On his entrance, Dr. Good put out his hand, saying, 'You are the very person whom next to my own family I am most anxious to see.' Mr. Russell replied, I am come for the purpose of imploring the blessing of the Redeemer upon you.'

Dr. Good then inquired, mentioning their names individually, if all his family were present? And each answering, he said in almost his usual tone of voice, and with much composure of manner, 'I cannot say I feel those triumphs which some Christians have experienced; but I have taken, what unfortunately the generality of Christians too much take, I have taken the middle walk of Christianity; I have endeavoured to live up to its duties and doctrines, but I have lived below its privileges. I most firmly believe all the doctrines of Scripture, as declared by our church.-I have endeavoured to take God for my father and my Saviour; but I want more spirituality, more humility, I want to be humbled.'Here he became much agitated, but yet went on, I have resigned myself to the will of God. If I know myself, I neither despair nor presume; but my constitution is by nature sanguine in all things, so that I am afraid of trusting to myself.' Some remarks being made about the righteousness of Christ, Dr. Good replied, 'No man living can be more sensible than I am, that there is nothing in ourselves; and of the absolute necessity of relying only upon the merits of Jesus Christ. I know there is a sense in which that expression of Saint Paul's, "of whom I am chief," is applicable to all; but there are some to whom it is peculiarly appropriate, and I fear I am one. I have not improved the opportunities given me; I have had large opportunities given me, and I have not improved them as I might: I have been led astray by the vanity of human learning, and the love of human applause.'

"Something being said about the cleansing blood of Jesus Christ; he again repeated, 'Do not think I

despair; I am, naturally sanguine, I am afraid of myself.' In compliance with Dr. Good's own request, Mr. Russell then read John i. 15, 16. dwelling upon the words 'Out of his fulness have we all received.’— Mr. Russell then asked, 'Is there any thing in particular that you wish me to pray for?'-Dr. Good answered, 'No, I have endeavoured to give you, not as a matter of form, but in the sight of God, a transcript of my feelings.' 'But,' repeated Mr. R, 'Is there nothing in particular that you wish me to pray for?' The reply was, 'I want to be more humbled under a sense of sin; I want more spirituality, more humility.' Mr. Russell accordingly knelt down to pray. But after this testimony to the truth, this statement of his feelings, in which all the powers of his soul and body seemed summoned up and concentrated, nature was exhausted.

"Those present had been throughout this trying, yet abundantly consolatory scene, fearful that a return of delirium would follow so much exhaustion; but before the conclusion of Mr. Russell's prayer, Dr. Good fell into the only peaceful sleep which he had enjoyed for many days.

"Sunday Dec. 31st, was a day of intense agony and frequent wanderings of mind; yet with intervals of perfect recollection and composure. About noon Dr. Good sent for his little grandson, and after solemnly blessing him, in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Ghost, he added instantly, 'Now no more,-go, I dare not trust myself;' shewing in this last remark a perfect self-recollection, a state of mind which continued for several hours. Shortly after this, some one mentioned Miss W.'s name,

(the young lady who was governess to his grandchildren.) Dr. Good desired to see her, and on her coming into the room, and taking the convulsed hand, which he evidently wished but wanted the power to put forth, he spoke some words expressive of his satisfaction as to her care of the children, and urging the responsibility of the charge she had undertaken, and her need of remembering it, especially, he added, 'whilst their mother was laid aside (meaning by attendance upon himself) and I know not how long that may last.' 'I don't know,' he said, 'how much I may have to suffer, but I am yet a strong man; whether we shall ever meet around the dining-table again, I cannot tell;' and concluded by some expression of hope and desire that he should meet her hereafter.

"Dr. Hooper arrived late in the evening of this day. Our dear father immediately knew him, described his own sufferings in the usual medical terms, and was not satisfied unless the quantity as well as quality of the medicines administered was stated to him. Dr. H. did not remain long, too quickly perceiving how unavailing, in this case, was human skill: with tenderness and frankness he told us his opinion, and assured us of his readiness to remain longer, notwithstanding his pressing medical engagements, if his continuance would be of the slightest benefit to his friend. In the intervals of composure, and when not suffering from extreme exacerbations of pain, some of Dr. G.'s family endeavoured to repeat occasionally short texts of scripture, to which he always listened with pleasure, appearing however much more struck with some than with others. On one occasion, without any suggestion

or leading remark from those around, he was heard to repeat distinctly with quivering convulsive lips, All the promises of God are yea and amen in Christ Jesus.' 'What words for dying lips to rest upon.' At another time, as one of his family was sitting by, he uttered some expression, not accurately remembered, of deep sorrow for sin. This text was then mentioned, 'If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.' He repeated, 'faithful: yes-nothing can be more suitable.'

"The same evening one of his family kneeling over him said, 'May I pray, can you bear it?' the reply was-'I am not sure, I am in great pain; but try and pray. Accordingly a few words were offered up, imploring that the Saviour would reveal more of His loving-kindness, His exceeding glory, to him; he listened attentively, and uttered something expressive of his feeling that these petitions were suitable to him, and of his deeply joining in them.

"On Monday, Jan. 1st, his sufferings increased, and his mind wandered. At 7 o'clock on the morning of this day his youngest daughter proposed repeating a well-known text of scripture, as the likeliest means of recalling him to himself. She was answered that this in his present weakness would only confuse him more. A text of scripture, however, was repeated, and the effect was wonderful; it seemed a perfect calling back of the mind: he listened with manifest pleasure, and concluded it himself. Many were the texts which were repeated at different intervals throughout this day, and to which he listened with more or less pleasure, as they more or less seemed to strike his feelings

« FöregåendeFortsätt »